What is repair? Repair is recognising the rupture in our relationship, that moment when we became unavailable to our children as their secure base and taking steps to restore our connection. 

Ruptures are inevitable. They happen, they are part of our relationship with our children.   

Unrepaired ruptures damage and weaken our connection. They can leave a lingering sense that it's not ok to share certain emotions, thoughts, and parts of ourselves and we may end up drifting further and further apart.    

Repaired ruptures make our relationships stronger and more secure, it offers opportunities to get to know each other in somewhat new ways, and get out of the patterns that no longer serve us. 

Ruptures are inevitable. Repair is optional.  

I don't think it's a coincidence that repair is the last topic covered in the Circle of Security Parenting course. That's where all pieces about secure…